{"id":4388,"date":"2016-04-01T11:36:30","date_gmt":"2016-04-01T10:36:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.october.co.uk\/latest\/?p=4388"},"modified":"2016-04-01T18:12:04","modified_gmt":"2016-04-01T17:12:04","slug":"knitting-attack","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.october.co.uk\/latest\/2016\/04\/01\/knitting-attack\/","title":{"rendered":"Wild old ladies in a crazy knitting attack"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Crocheted<\/a>

Crocheted Die Neue Frankfurter Schule<\/p><\/div>\n

News is just emerging of another crazy crochet knitting attack, believed to have been perpetrated by what the police have referred to as an unstoppable gang of, \u2018wild old ladies\u2019 You may wish to take exception with the collective noun used by the authorities, in that such an ensemble would not be a \u2018gang\u2019, but perhaps a \u2018zimmer\u2019 or a \u2018large sherry\u2019 of wild old ladies, but that would be splitting a blue rinsed hair. The point is, that after a recent break out at the Shady Pines Rest Home Chipping Norton, (for Ladies of Local Standing), there had been a marked increase in what is now known as \u2018Yarn Bombing\u2019, a kind of textile based graffiti.<\/p>\n

According to Detective Superintendent Arthur Werther, of the Chipping Norton Constabulary, \u2018If it stands still for more than half an hour, it\u2019s likely to get knitted\u2019. He went on to say that although the handiwork of the swift needled assassins is plain to see, the national network of these craft based attack squads is becoming increasingly tricky to unravel.<\/p>\n

History<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"Citroen

Fifi – Crocheted Citroen 2CV<\/p><\/div>\n

The practice does have history however, and was initially conceived of in the US, where Texas knitters were trying to find a creative way to use up yarn leftover from their knitting projects.<\/p>\n

The origins of the movement have been attributed more specifically to Magda Sayeg, from Houston, who says she \u2018first got the idea in 2005, when she covered the door handle of her boutique with a custom-made cozy\u2019.<\/p>\n

This is all well and good, but what began as a clever way to keep a door handle warm, has now warped into a graffiti style knitted vandalism. It is especially prevalent in the Nottingham area, thanks to a clandestine collective called \u2018I think I\u2019ve Just Knit Myself\u2019.<\/p>\n

Where they differ is in their speed of attack, enabling them to knit otherwise moveable objects, once considered impossible. An undisclosed local has disclosed, that during a recent trip to Asda in West Bridgford to buy a cooked chicken, he returned to the car park to discover that his beloved Citroen 2CV had been mercilessly crocheted.<\/p>\n

\"Crocheted

Crocheted scooter<\/p><\/div>\n

\u2018The sight of what had happened to Fifi was almost too much to digest\u2019 the victim reported, \u2018but I went into shock on the way home when I saw what had happened to a nearby vehicle\u2019.<\/p>\n

\u2018I was only in the shop for five minutes, who the hell can knit that quickly\u2019?
\n<\/strong>
\nBy the time he had removed the car cozy his chicken was stone cold, but in happier news, Asda have given him a \u00a35 George voucher, to purchase any one of their range of three piece suits.<\/p>\n

Wild old ladies in a crazy knitting attack? What next?<\/h2>\n

\"Un_Ponte_di_Lana<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

News is just emerging of another crazy crochet knitting attack, believed to have been perpetrated by what the police have referred to as an unstoppable gang of, \u2018wild old ladies\u2019 You may wish to take exception with the collective noun used by the authorities, in that such an ensemble would not be a \u2018gang\u2019, but […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":4425,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4388","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-latest-news"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nWild old ladies in a crazy knitting crochet attack<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"News is just emerging of another crazy crochet knitting attack, believed to have been perpetrated by an unstoppable gang of, \u2018wild old ladies\u2019.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.october.co.uk\/latest\/2016\/04\/01\/knitting-attack\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Wild old ladies in a crazy knitting attack\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"News is just emerging of another crazy crochet knitting attack, believed to have been perpetrated by an unstoppable gang of, \u2018wild old ladies\u2019.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.october.co.uk\/latest\/2016\/04\/01\/knitting-attack\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"October Textiles - 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